Darometer
(rhymes with barometer!)
This is a work in progress and these measurements have been
listed here in random order of pressure.
asleep
comatose
dead to the world
ignoring you
ignoring everyone
reading quietly
playing quietly
annoyed at television
annoyed at NPR
trying to fix computer
hungry
famished
ignoring Willie
ignoring Gwen
drunk
fidgety
fidgeting
talking to self
yelling at self
yelling at someone not in room
yelling at someone in room
yelling at television
yelling at radio
at the grocery store
crying
screaming
screaming in pain
screaming in pleasure
watching "The West Wing"
watching "A Room With a View"
watching "Joe Versus the Volcano"
showering
shaving
blushing
stammering
stuttering
speechless
bobbing head
rolling eyes
drinking
high
hallucinating
exercising
horny
answering phone
not answering phone
listening to showtunes
listening to classical music
listening to Nine Inch Nails
listening to Poi Dog Pondering
balancing checkbook
overdrawn
reading Noel Coward
quoting Steve Martin
quoting John Waters
wanting to put a bullet through the brains of every panda that
wouldn't fuck to save its species
reading subtitles
being pragmatic
being pragmatistic